Do you ever stress out about doing the wrong thing? Worry about what is the right thing to say or do?
If you’ve been bludgeoning yourself for doing something ‘wrong’, you’re not alone. Most of us were brought up with the concept that there was only one right way to do something, and if we didn’t do it right, we were wrong.
The issue of right/wrong will manifest to different degrees, depending upon how much of it you took on as a child. If you were an easy-going kid, you may not stress out about this very much. If you took things seriously, chances are good that you have some level of perfectionism or people-pleasing running. In other words, you are still trying to get everything ‘right’ so as not to be judged as ‘wrong’.
If you think about the issue of right and wrong, who gets to decide? Parents? Teachers? Religious Leaders? Society? The Government? The media? In one country, it’s considered extremely rude to burp, while in another, the burp is the ultimate compliment to the host – who is right and who is wrong? One religion celebrates Hanukah while another celebrates Christmas – who is right and who is wrong? One parent says it’s not Ok to curse while the other parent curses up a blue streak – which parent is right?
Trying to behave correctly at all times and not do anything ‘wrong’ can be crazy-making. It leads to performance anxiety, stress and panic attacks. And, since there is no universal agreement about the exact ‘right way’ to do anything, it is downright impossible.
The idea that there is a right way or a wrong way to do anything is irrational from the Loving perspective. The truth is that there are an infinite number of ways to do anything.
Think about something simple, such as redecorating your bedroom. What color would you want to paint the walls? White? Green? Light blue? Beige? Pale peach? Bright pink with black polka dots? Guess what? Whatever color you would pick would be Ok because there is no right or wrong way to do anything. If you ended up picking a color you didn’t like, you are free to change it at any point – the cost of the paint is simply the price of the lesson.
When you begin to move into a higher state of consciousness, you will be moving up and out of the duality of right/wrong reality and into the infinite acceptance of the Loving. In the Loving, there is no such thing as right or wrong; there is only learning and growing. There is no way to blow it. Everything you do is Ok.
When you understand this concept, you will begin to be easier on yourself, to relax and breathe more deeply. Since there is no one clear right way, you can simply ask yourself, “How would I like to do this?” If there are other people involved, you can negotiate a decision and come to an agreement that works for everyone. Or, if not everyone, something that feels Ok for the majority.
Let go of viewing things as right or wrong. Move into the infinite possibility of the Loving. Say, “From now on, I get to decide what feels best to me.”
Many Blessings of Joy and Vibrant Freedom
Action Step ~ Let go of right/wrong and move into the infinite possibility of the Loving. Declaration: “There is no one right or wrong way to do anything. From now on, I get to decide what feels best to me.”
Additional Support: Listen to this audio on infinite possibility. This is an 8-minute closed-eye process; please refrain from driving while listening.